1 month down...

Well, here we are, almost 1 month down in this year!  Who has stuck to their resolutions? LOL!  As you know (or you should!), I didn't have any real "resolutions" this year, but I do believe that this will be the year that I better myself and become the person I am supposed to be.  I can't say that I know yet who that girl is (I know this is getting a little off track, but am I too old to call myself a "girl" anymore?  You know what?  Hell's no, I'll call myself a "girl" until I decide to stop!), but I do know that I have been unhappy with who I have been for a long time.  All around, not one specific thing.  So this year, I am giving myself the attention I deserve, instead of always just ignoring my needs.  Now, that doesn't mean that I am putting myself and my wants, needs, and desires above those of my children, lets not have crazy talk here!  But I have learned how to make time for myself, how not to use my kids, my life, as an excuse for why I can't make time for myself.  I have stayed on my regimen that I mentioned before, I still happily get up every morning ready to face the day at 4:30 am!  I have never ever ever (I could really go on with the ever's, but I think you get the picture, no?) been a morning person, but now I cannot sleep late, I'm ready to get up and work out!  So that has become a total habit, as have the nightly workouts, it feels so fucking good to run farther and farther, and faster and faster each night!!  I won't talk numbers because frankly I was very pissed off at my scale when I got on it yesterday, but I won't let it get me down, instead I will just go back to staying off of the scale and not worry about what that bitch has to say!
I have a long way to go, but hopefully at some point this year, I will be able to look at myself and be happy with the person that I see, knowing that she is taking care of herself and is truly happy.
.....and for the kids....
Of course I have new pictures of them!!!!  We recently went to the snow in Flagstaff and they had a BLAST sledding and playing in the snow!  So behold, the Mc-kiddo's fun snow day.....

Christmas 2010

No more running from the past...

WELCOME 2011!!! I cannot tell you how much of a BITCH 2010 was to me! Was there good to 2010? You betcha! But the majority of it was really just not, so I am one happy chiquita to see it get the hell outta my life!
Do you have any "New Year's Resolutions"? I don't really. Not specifically at least. I don't have the whole "I want to lose weight" (although, really? I always want to do that!), or "I want to start doing _____" sort of list going. What my goals are? Well, I just want to make the most I can of my life. I'm tired of feeling like I am not accomplishing anything, like I am spinning my wheels! And it's not just for the new year, it's something I have been trying to work on for awhile, and I think I am finally in a place where I can believe in myself, my abilities, and I can make any changes that I want to!
For the past month I have completely stepped away from my treadmill. I haven't even gotten on it one time! Instead, I made a habit of getting up every morning and "Shredding" (doing a workout series by Jillian Michaels called "The 30 Day Shred"). I've been really good at getting up at 4:45 and just DOING it! I missed a couple of days, but overall did it for a full month. Did I notice a difference? I sure did! Dropped a couple of sizes (HELLS YEAH!) and pounds, which is ultimately a goal for me, but I also noticed some other changes that I like! I've NEVER been a morning person, and that has been a real problem for working out when I have a full time job, 3 children and often another side job or class going on. I have always known that if I don't get up in the morning and do it, it will not happen because by the end of the day I am completely WIPED out! But in the past? I just couldn't do it. The alarm would go off and I'd decide that maybe tomorrow would be the day? Well, the month of December 2010 I totally blew that problem out of the water! With my new job (have I mentioned how much I LOVE it? Cuz I DO!!!) I don't have to be there at 6:45 like the other place, so I realized I CAN get up and work out first thing! So I just did it! Day after day, and before I knew it, I actually woke up BEFORE the alarm, and I have been eager to get up each day! I KNOW, who the hell has taken over Patty? I don't know how it happened but I am glad it finally has! I'm feeling really good, and that? Is what I want!
So tonight..... I decided to get on that treadmill. Now it's not like that is a daunting task, I actually love that machine and really love to just RUN on it! But, it has been over a month and I have been sick for the past week, so I wasn't sure how good I would do! Well, OMFG, what a difference that month of working out Shredding has done!!! I ran, a really good workout and I found that it was EASY! I felt like I could go on forever, but knew that it was prolly a good idea to not actually KILL myself, so I did a regular workout, but when I was finished I still wanted to do more, so I hopped over to my rowing machine and I rowed. And I rowed and rowed and rowed! I did DOUBLE what I have ever done in one sitting! WHO is this girl?! After absolutely killing that rowing machine, I hopped back on the treadmill! Joe looked up at me from his computer and I laughed and said I'm only gonna walk to bring the heart rate down, but after about 30 seconds of walking I decided I wanted to run again!!!! And so I logged another mile running, just for fun! I finished up and I feel absolutely fantastic! So this new me? I really like this chic!
While I was running, it dawned on me. I think that I have actually changed my outlook, my way of thinking, my attitude! I realized that I am no longer running from anything in my past, but instead I am actually running towards my future. And that's all I want to do, keep moving forward, no matter what obstacles come my way!